I’m always listening in my bedroom on my bed in Kevin to what the prospector alter is saying

Should I just go kill myself this Friday?

It will all be over in two weeks is what he constantly says

I have had enough and it’s been years of bullshit

Why don’t I just ring my father?

Because there is no point and I’m waiting till I believe I was just psychotic-

Yes that’s why am waiting to end myself?

Laugh

Another flashback and two flash backs –

I’m remembering everything and he probably did have a gun when I went and saw him in paraparamu –