My father is probably in an old persons home. His girlfriend is younger than him, and I bet she just wanted the house.

I want to go today – and wow it will be depressing being homeless.

I’ve two flats to look at on Saturday, and I’ll have to go to the pool and have a shower and shave.

At least I’ll be semi warm with this blanket.

You have to worry as you will be kicked out and it is raining.

Will I go to jail with no fixed abide?

Probably – God it would be nice if I could remember what I’ve done.

I cannot remember because I dissociated and I guarantee the oldest alter took over.

I hate it around Aroles Valkyrie and Lyn will be on today.

I’m pretty sure I slept with her in my twenties – she seems very familiar and she will have spoken to Bevan last night, who hates me.

He was running the place I stayed at over Xovid, as a jail house.

Absolutely everyone there had been I. Jail, except me.

Middle class – too that’s me, but I understand the working classes 5 too.

Well I went to a decile one school for starters.

I’m harder today, and I had my injection yesterday.

I cried last night – the person who will adorn the youngest alter is the psychologist

I’ll have to keep away from Newtown.

Atweia may be my only option and I’ll not drink except for today and I won’t like it.

I’m over drinking as it hurts my body.

I just put my thoracic regim in again today.

I have to go and I would like to go now.

I’ve no friends to speak off – they all have been angered by my various breakdowns

I cannot believe Shain is oh with Gareth raping me.

For fucks sake –

Obviously none of those people from my twenties were good friends.

I thought they were as I lived my friends and considered them more important than family

The only person I give a shit about now is CY

I should have been there when he was growing up

He’s with 21 or 22

He will be through his studies now and I’m sure he has studied the wrong thing.

His brother looks like an arswhile –

I thought nothing when homeless and I am sure Frances had an aboetion.

I have gotten a few woman pregnant but what about that girl I walked past who said that’s where you got your brains from

It’s just a shame that I have had so many depression type breakdowns

Laugh – I cannot believe I went through the ward twice ; depressed and wanting to die ), and on the release notes they said I had been manic

Anger at the constant misssiagniais – is not mania

Thank God Sally did EMSE and met the real me, who is lovely and a real person, and a lot smarter than me

I have just put my thoracic spine in and it’s nearly 6 am

I’ll go for breakfast at seven

I cannot believe this bullshit and now I despise the middle classes for tvwirh non understanding and judgments of people who have been at war

For just over two decades I was in defence mode against my family the. I had to go to war against the psychiatric system for thirty years.

At least I finally have twenty milligrams of SAEI daily.

The shrink tells me the meds are correct, but why am I on sodium valproate?

I have come off this before and I sliwl loose my mind

It’s a mood stabiliser –

Why does it work with SID?

Maybe I have bipolar 2 and SID?

This is what I’m beginning to believe I have anyway and it would explain the deep depression.